Considering the importance of our thoughts

Sandra Bowden 02/10/2015

Thoughts….we all have them, and they do impact our lives emotionally, behaviorally, and within our relationships with those around us. Many experts in the field of counselling and psychology have researched this topic in depth, to bring us new ways of understanding and managing our own thought patterns. In many instances the focus is on how to change our thought processes to have a different emotional outcome, or even bringing about a change in our attitude towards a particular situation, experience or person.

However, in all my years of working in the field of counselling, my clients have taught me, as human beings, we are not just a mind with a thought process. We are in fact a whole being (mind and body); with thoughts, emotional/physical experiences, beliefs, values, culture, and religion/or spirituality. The concept of change often saw clients coming in for 1 or maybe 2 sessions only. Perhaps because change implied hard work, or a previous way of doing and being in the world to be somehow flawed? In shifting the word change to shift; driven by the question how this way of thinking and being is helpful or unhelpful, seemed to create a curiosity to explore, rather than avoid or shut down.

In the process of curiosity, it is essential not to judge or criticize our thoughts or emotional experiences which comes into our awareness, as it tends to shut the process down. The practice of mindfulness brought us the skill of observation. So instead we observe; when I think a particular thought/way, what is my emotional experience, what is the belief supporting the thought, what is happening in my body. Instead of reacting (out of an unknown place) to a situation, person, event, experience, we learn to shift into a response (out of a known place).

In the process of curiosity much can happen. We may need to review our beliefs to ensure these are serving us well. Are they in fact our own, or did we borrow them from others. Our beliefs are important as they are often the very foundation from which we live our lives. When we ascertain certain beliefs are self-limiting and dis-empowering not just to us as individuals, but those we love and care about, we need to question whether we will continue with these beliefs. It is not about our beliefs being right or wrong, rather do they serve us lovingly. When our beliefs are working for and nurturing us, we can also respect opposing and different beliefs.

Thoughts are real and very powerful. Thoughts create our life pattern of how we are in the world, and in relation to those around us. Our thoughts come from deep within, connected to what we belief, our values, and what we have experienced in our life thus far. When we take time to observe and pay attention, not just to our mind and thoughts, but also our body sensations, we become better informed about where the shift needs to occur.

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